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General Off Topic Almost anything goes! |
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Apple Card Use Reqt's generate a rash of hiliarious memes
Apple debuted its Apple Card with a strict set of use requirements:
From the Apple Card support document: "If your titanium Apple Card comes into contact with hard surfaces or materials, it's possible that the coating can be damaged." Thus:
Additionally, be warned: Household cleaners, compressed air, aerosol sprays, solvents, ammonia and abrasives are also all too harsh for the dainty card. And....here's the capper: "Some fabrics, like leather and denim, might cause permanent discoloration that will not wash off." All these strict requirements immediately resulted in lots of hiliarious memes and posts on Twitter: "Don’t put the Apple Card in your wallet. Hang in a floating glass frame in a dimly lit, year round 70 degree, humidity controlled location. No flash photography please." yes i promise to never put it in my wallet or wear pants i guess Never place near other cards. Do not look directly at card. Annoint with myrrh and francincense once per month. tired: let's get rid of headphone jacks wired: f*ck wallets and pants If Apple Card begins to smoke, get away immediately. Seek shelter and cover head. Apple Card may stick to certain types of skin. Do not taunt Apple Card. “Soon to be announced: a $500 wallet designed specifically for the Apple Card,” Apple to release “Apple Card Cloth” in 2020. $789. And, of course, the new iSock: Apple says clean Apple Card with an essential oils-soaked citrus peel and store it in a climate-controlled vault accessible only by those who solve the riddle of the Sphinx And, my favorite: Do not look directly at Apple Card. Do not speak to Apple Card. Do not denigrate Apple Card in Its Holy Presence. When not in use, Apple Card should be returned to a uniformly lit white cube containing only a British man softly repeating al-lu-min-ee-um. Some folks said that the strict Apple Card requirements reminded them of the classic SNL "Happy Fun Ball" video skit. LOL. https://youtu.be/7gzDC-2ZO8I Ah, yes. Apple, once again, placing form over function to the extent where products are often rendered useless from any practical perspective. I've been saying for a while now that Apple Corporate has completely "lost the plot", as the Brits say. Now, I'm convinced of it: https://youtu.be/wg9579wvLFE
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Lumin P1 streamer/DAC/preamp, Constellation Inspiration integrated TT: Michell Gyro SE MkII, SME V, Koetsu Urushi Vermilion, EAR324. Harbeth 30.2s, REL R-305, Shunyata Alpha V2 ICs, Alpha V2 SPs, Sigma XC, Sigma NRv2, Omega QR-s & Alpha NRv2 PCs, segmented Altaira SG stack w/ Alpha & Omega CGCs, Everest 8000 PD. Remote Server Room: Uptone EtherREGEN, AfterDark Master Clock & LPS, Alita, Battle Angel, (Akasa NUC Roon Core), iFi DC Purifiers (for SMPS used for Alita & router), Shunyata Gemini combo power distributor & Altaira-type CG GP-NR hub, Venom & Alpha CGCs, Shunyata NRv14 power cords for digital components. |
#2
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OMG, that is beyond hilarious!
I'm gonna go right out and pick mine up today so that I can frame it in a bullet proof case and place it on my mantle. |
#3
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Quote:
After all, its titanium....
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Lumin P1 streamer/DAC/preamp, Constellation Inspiration integrated TT: Michell Gyro SE MkII, SME V, Koetsu Urushi Vermilion, EAR324. Harbeth 30.2s, REL R-305, Shunyata Alpha V2 ICs, Alpha V2 SPs, Sigma XC, Sigma NRv2, Omega QR-s & Alpha NRv2 PCs, segmented Altaira SG stack w/ Alpha & Omega CGCs, Everest 8000 PD. Remote Server Room: Uptone EtherREGEN, AfterDark Master Clock & LPS, Alita, Battle Angel, (Akasa NUC Roon Core), iFi DC Purifiers (for SMPS used for Alita & router), Shunyata Gemini combo power distributor & Altaira-type CG GP-NR hub, Venom & Alpha CGCs, Shunyata NRv14 power cords for digital components. |
#4
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Quote:
apparently not when it's in the form of a credit card. |
#5
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Quote:
Bicycle frame manufacturers that build bike frames out of titanium generally leave the frame unpainted and just put on their company graphics as die-cut decals. You can take a Merlin or Lightspeed titanium-framed mountain bike, beat the frickin' crap out of it off-road, run it through the mud, sand, and rain and just hose it off, and it woud look and work like new. Only Apple could f*ck up something as tough and durable as Ti with all their fancy coatings and "prettification" to the point where Ti could also be stained, scratched, or corroded.
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Lumin P1 streamer/DAC/preamp, Constellation Inspiration integrated TT: Michell Gyro SE MkII, SME V, Koetsu Urushi Vermilion, EAR324. Harbeth 30.2s, REL R-305, Shunyata Alpha V2 ICs, Alpha V2 SPs, Sigma XC, Sigma NRv2, Omega QR-s & Alpha NRv2 PCs, segmented Altaira SG stack w/ Alpha & Omega CGCs, Everest 8000 PD. Remote Server Room: Uptone EtherREGEN, AfterDark Master Clock & LPS, Alita, Battle Angel, (Akasa NUC Roon Core), iFi DC Purifiers (for SMPS used for Alita & router), Shunyata Gemini combo power distributor & Altaira-type CG GP-NR hub, Venom & Alpha CGCs, Shunyata NRv14 power cords for digital components. Last edited by Puma Cat; 08-23-2019 at 07:43 PM. |
#6
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When you're right, you're right!
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