Joke of the Day

[vintage_tube]

Q: Why is the letter B very cool?

A: Because it's sitting in the AC

Best Sir,

Bob

[vintage_tube]

Q: What starts with a P, ends with an E, and has a 1,000 letters?

A: Post office.

Best Sir,

Bob

[vintage_tube]

As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, "If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman."

She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?"

A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here, iron this!".

Best Sir,

Bob

That's bad.

[vintage_tube]

A young woman was taking golf lessons and had just started playing her first round of golf when she suffered a bee sting. Her pain was so intense that she decided to return to the clubhouse for medical assistance.

The golf pro saw her heading back and said, “You are back early, what’s wrong?” “I was stung by a bee!” she said.

“Where?” he asked. “Between the first and second hole.” she replied.

He nodded and said, “Your stance is far too wide.”

Best Sirs,

Bob

OMG

[vintage_tube]

A man asks, “God, why did you make woman so beautiful?” God responded, ”So you would love her.”

The man asks, “But God, why did you make her so dumb?”

God replied, “So she would love you.”

Best Sir,

Bob

In my case....So true.

[vintage_tube]

How did the medical community come up with the term "PMS"?

"Mad Cow Disease" was already taken.

Best Sirs,

Bob

[vintage_tube]

A tough looking group of hairy bikers are riding when they see a girl about to jump off a bridge, so they stop. The leader, a big burly man, gets off his bike and says, "What are you doing?"

"I'm going to commit suicide," she says. While he doesn’t want to appear insensitive, he also doesn’t want to miss an opportunity, so he asks, "Well, before you jump, why don't you give me a kiss?"

She does, and it is a long, deep, lingering kiss. After she's finished, the tough, hairy biker says, "Wow! That was the best kiss I’ve ever had! That's a real talent you’re wasting. You could be famous.

Why are you committing suicide?" "My parents don't like me dressing up like a girl…"

Best Sirs,

Bob

[vintage_tube]

A man is being arrested by a female police officer, who informs him, "Anything you say can and will be held against you."

The man replies, "Boobs!"

Best Sirs,

Bob

[vintage_tube]

A man is sitting at a bar enjoying a cocktail when an exceptionally gorgeous, sexy, young woman enters. The man can’t stop staring at her. The young woman notices this and walks directly toward him.

Before he could offer his apologies for being so rude, the young woman says to him, "I'll do anything you want me to do, no matter how kinky, for $100, with one condition."

Flabbergasted, the man asks what the condition is. The young woman replies, "You have to tell me what you want me to do in just three words." The man considers her proposition for a moment, withdraws his wallet from his pocket, and hands the woman five $20 bills.

He looks deeply into her eyes and slowly says, "Paint my house."

Best Sir,

Bob

[jdandy]